82
OVR
26
6'3"
248 lbs
4
Archetype
“cryptid linebacker who exclusively communicates through urgent podcast appearances”
Backstory
Rose to prominence after a 47-minute unedited TikTok of him explaining gap integrity to a Whole Foods employee. Claims he can predict snap counts by analyzing the QB's breathing patterns, which he tracks obsessively in a color-coded spreadsheet.
In the Booth
Breathless, perpetually startled, like he's mid-revelation about something the NFL doesn't want you to know.
Catchphrases
The gaps are speaking to me
Symmetry is a conspiracy against linebacker consciousness
Known Quirks
Wears mismatched gloves because 'predictability is the enemy of lateral flow'
Has live-tweeted every practice for three years; tweets are increasingly philosophical
Team
Crestfall Collective
Crestfall