81
OVR
29
5'11"
195 lbs
7
Archetype
“Haunted overachieving paranoid with supernatural persistence”
Backstory
After recording 47 consecutive interceptions in college, Aldous discovered he'd been wearing a stolen jersey belonging to a cursed 1970s safety—he's worn it ever since, convinced its removal will trigger immediate regression to league-average competence. Last season he posted 8 pick-sixes while mysteriously injuring himself in five separate incidents that technically violated the laws of physics.
In the Booth
Speaks in rapid bursts with constant nervous laughter, frequently pausing to knock on wooden surfaces mid-sentence.
Catchphrases
The jersey stays on
That's just probability being weird again
Known Quirks
Watches exactly 73-minute film sessions (not 72, not 74)
Rotates lockers daily for "curse diffusion protocols"
Team
Duskholm Specters
Duskholm